🎵 Citrus Uppercut! 🎤 Terrence Cole 💿 Genre: Funk, Disco, Miami Heat ABOUT THIS SONG "Citrus Uppercut" is Terrence Cole's retro funk comedy about a grocery run gone very wrong. Slap bass, wah guitar, congas, and punchy horns kick off as he tells the story in disbelief: he opened a simple bag of limes and lemons, and something inside it hit him. The first verse replays the ambush blow by blow, innocent produce suddenly swinging, juice in the eye, and a man left wondering why his groceries want to fight. The pre-chorus insists he came for refreshment, not a brawl with vitamin C. The chorus is a call-and-response party hook with Motown backing vocals, turning a sour surprise into a dance-floor shout. A stop-time break freezes the band as he realizes the lemons have their fists up, and earns his grudging respect. The second verse escalates into a full produce-aisle rumble, with other citrus jumping in and one caped surprise rolling up late. The deadpan outro brings his peace plan for next time: buy fruit that doesn't know how to box.
Lyrics
[Spoken Intro] Naw, man. Look, I got a bag with limes and lemons, right? Just mindin' my own business. I opened that bag... And somethin' PUNCHED me! What the HELL, man?! [Beat stops] That was no Florida snowbird! [Explosive funk downbeat] CITRUS UPPERCUT! [Verse 1] Four little limes and a lemon or two, Lookin' all innocent, like produce do. Reached in the bag, wasn't lookin' for trouble, Next thing I know, I'm seein' double! One came swingin', another came flyin', I ain't ashamed, I thought I was dyin'! Juice in my eye, got my face all scrunched, Somebody tell me why my groceries punched! [Pre-Chorus] Naw, man! Who put hands on me?! Ain't nobody here but vitamin C! I came for refreshment, not a fight, Now I'm squarin' up with a bag of Sprite! [Chorus] CITRUS UPPERCUT! (Hey! Watch out!) Got me puckered up! (What's that about?!) Lemons throwin' hands, Limes got attitude! I just wanted somethin' sweet, Not a fight with my food! CITRUS UPPERCUT! (Oh, you got jokes?!) Hit me with that sour, Now I'm seein' citrus ghosts! [Spoken Break] Hold up. HOLD UP. Did that lemon just square up? [Pause] Whoah... They actually put hands up. [Beat returns] RESPECT! [Verse 2] I ain't never seen a grapefruit flex, Orange in the corner yellin', "WHO'S NEXT?" Lime got a left hook, lemon got a right, Whole produce section wanna start a fight! I said, "Naw, man, I don't want no beef!" Lemon said, "Too late! You touched my leaf!" I backed away slow, tried to make my escape, Then a tangerine came rollin' with a cape! [Chorus] CITRUS UPPERCUT! (Hey! Watch out!) Got me puckered up! (What's that about?!) Lemons throwin' hands, Limes got attitude! I just wanted somethin' sweet, Not a fight with my food! [Outro] Look... I respect the hustle. I respect the hands. But next time? I'm buyin' watermelon. [Pause] ...Watermelon don't box. [One final bass hit] NAW, MAN!
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